9 Ways to have a better conversation with your teens.

1. Don't multitask

Be fully engaged in the conversation. Allow for all your attention to be focused on your child. This is the best way to actively listen and show your involvement in the conversation.

2. Use open-ended questions

Ask questions that expand and enhance the conversation. Allow for the conversation to be a learning process, and let the teen be able to fully express themselves by asking open-ended questions.

3. Don't equate your experience with theirs

Let your teen fully express and share their experience without you comparing it to your own. Let them have their moment and time to share their experience without it being overshadowed. This will allow for the listener to get a better understanding of their unique perspectives and worldview.

4. Try not to repeat yourself

Make sure you are using a wide range of vocabulary and language to respond to your teen. Repetition can show that the conversation has ran its course and doesn’t enhance the subject being discussed. It also shows that you haven’t analyzed the persons point of view.

5. Listen

Just well listening gives you many chances of good conservation. It's because it shows deep consideration to your child. Strive to actively listen by listening to understand and showing attention through body language. Listen without fixing and interacting with the speaker by actively thinking about what they are saying.

6. Be brief

It is important to get your message across to ensure that the information is understood. You want to engage your teen and make sure that they capture all the important information you are providing. Being brief also will captured their attention and have them actively thinking about the message of the conversation.

7. Ask honest questions not loaded questions

Be honest with the things you ask your teen. Don’t ask heavy ended questions because it does not strengthen the conversation. Being honest with questions allows for both the parent and child to grow and learn from the conversation.

8. Validate their feelings

Validation is one way that we communicate acceptance of ourselves and others. Validation doesn't mean agreeing or approving. Validation is a way of communicating that the relationship is important and solid even when you disagree on issues. It is the recognition and acceptance of another person's thoughts, feelings, sensations, and behaviors as understandable.

9. Go with the flow

Evaluate what should be said and what shouldn’t. Be selective on what response you are going to give and how it might effect the tone of the conversation.

References:

https://www.ted.com/talks/celeste_headlee_10_ways_to_have_a_better_conversation/discussion#t-426629

https://dynamiccatholic.com/everyday-life/unquestionable-habits-of-a-great-listener/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMI3r6C8--l4wIVE4_ICh2xiwXSEAAYASAAEgKtEfD_BwE

https://childmind.org/article/tips-communicating-with-teen/